TO: 3rd Lord Admiral Kraath zantai-Ajerris       StarDate: 9206.01

FROM: la',ra'wI' Kelvik sutai-Dok'Marr

LOCATION: Listening OutPost "Filad" 

SUBJECT: Monthly Status Report



Listed below is a summary of all the trouble we could cause and get 
into during the past month.


1. Explored the star system in sector 17. I sent an "Away Team" 
   to explore the fourth planet, the only one habitable. 
   The inhabitants were not very friendly. Our first indication 
   was when the Away Team beamed back up, they were all dead. I 
   didn't take kindly to this, and so to give the new weapons 
   officer some practice, I had the planet blasted to a burned 
   out cinder. That should teach them some respect.

2. MUTINY: This month's mutiny was staged by the chief navigator 
   and some of his henchmen. My first officer was a casualty, from 
   a boobytrapped toilet. Talk about a mess. Anyhow, they tried to 
   seize the bridge, and failing that they took over engineering. 
   We had a hell of a good time retaking the engine room, the only 
   thing that spoiled it was the light casualties. During the
   fighting, one of the reactors was damaged, and so I had the 
   mutineers go in and repair it. After they were finished 
   (getting great suntans I might add),I had them all shot. 
   The chief navigator was the only exception, I have him cleaning 
   the ship's waste disposal system from the inside with a toothbrush.

3. CORE REBELLION: As you know, we participated in the crushing 
   of the re-bellion of the Core star systems. We were the first 
   to arrive, coming out of warp right in the sights of the rebel 
   fleet. We were outnumbered 52 to 1 which meant they didn't stand 
   a chance. We swooped in at them blasting ships left and right. 
   We destroyed about 125 rebel ships and would've had the record if 
   those maggots from the I.S.S. Jason hadn't shown up. They always 
   have to show off. Anyway, in our enthusiam, we accidentally hit a 
   few of our of own ships,but we didn't destroy any. I had the weapons 
   officer beaten to a pulp for that. He was a trainee so I was lenient.
   After that, we went in on the ebel home planet, laying waste to 
   everything and generally having a good time. we then set down and 
   I let the crew loose for a bit of rape, pillage and looting. They 
   were in need of a little relaxation. Unfortunately, we ran out of 
   penicilin rather quickly.

4. INCURSION: The incursion took place at the Federation neutral zone. 
   It was a Federation scout ship, the U.S.S. MONKIES. As much as I
   hate it, I hailed them before firing. They hailed with "Hey Hey, 
   we're the Monkies!". I replied "Hey Hey, you're history!" and gave 
   them a good blast. What wimps; they didn't put up a fight. No fun 
   at all.

5. SECOND INCURSION: This incursion was made by a Romulan vessel a week
   later. They babbled something about a rescue mission, but naturally 
   I didn't believe them. I immediately set the weapons officer to 
   blasting and we did some damage before they engaged their cloaking 
   device. They managed to return fire and got in a lucky shot and hit 
   us. There was no damage, and unfortunately, no casualties. Since we 
   are equipped with the new experimental Remove O' Cloak Ray, we 
   located them quickly and blasted them some more. Unfortunately, 
   they managed to escape with only major damage. I had the weapons 
   officer shot for that: I can't stand too much inefficency.


Thats all for this month, sorry about the casualties, they'll be 
higher next month. We may even go for the record.



*signed*




Kelvik sutai-Dok'Marr (Bob Ferguson) - SysOp              
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Klingon Bird of Prey BBS! -BattleCruiser-
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