
Floods and Locusts
by Muffy Mandel

This month we continue our look into the backgrounds of certain
VaporWare executives with a peek at the life of Dorian Debacle,
VaporWare's Vice President of Operations. 

Dorian "SOS" Debacle was born in Johnstown, Pennsylvania during a
flood.  This isn't too surprising, since floods hit Johnstown as
regularly as bus service hits most other communities. 

Dorian's childhood was littered with what Dorian terms "interesting
events."  Cars he was riding in had flat tires and all manner of
mechanical failures.  Buildings he was occupying spontaneously caught
fire.  Where ever Dorian's family moved (his father was in the
military), their new community was suddenly struck by drought, flu,
locusts, earthquakes, tornadoes, hurricanes, and other symptoms of
Nature's fury.

Dorian was a junior at Penn State/Capitol Campus in Middletown,
PA. on March 28, 1979, when the Three Mile Island nuclear power
plant's Unit Two reactor experienced an "incident".  That Dorian was
a student intern at the plant and on duty that day has been largely
overlooked by history.  Dorian, however, has decided to stay away
from jobs that would bring him in contact with hazardous materials.

His first job after college found Dorian working as a customer
engineer for a major mainframe computer vendor.  The results of his
visiting many different customer sites caused the booming growth of
the EDP Disaster Recovery industry in the 1980s.

A lifetime at the center of one crisis after another has taught
Dorian to be a creative problem solver when under pressure.  This
kind of experience is just the thing Luther Lecks was looking for in
an Operations manager when he was starting Vaporware Corporation.
Mr. Lecks considers the tremendous insurance rates caused by nearly 
constant accidents and disasters worthwhile in order to have a
manager of Dorian's caliber available when something goes wrong.

Since he is prohibited by Federal law from boarding an airplane,
Dorian travels by train, bus or automobile.  A lifelong baseball fan,
Dorian gets to attend games around the country during his business
travels.  He finds the television baseball blooper reels boring since
he has always seen the most spectacular collisions and disastrous
plays in person.  Dorian had box seats for the first game of the 1989
World Series which was delayed for several days by an earthquake.  A
trip to the east coast kept him from seeing the rescheduled game.

Dorian's supervision of the completion of a new Vaporware production
facility in the Mississippi River Valley was impeded this summer by
floods that lasted several weeks.  The new chip manufacturing plant
may be relocated to Denver to avoid further troubles of this kind.

Dorian's parents are now retired and live in southern Florida.  His
vacation trip to visit them last year was marred by Hurricane Andrew.
His train trip to Florida this year was interrupted in Alabama when a
bridge collapsed.  Legislation is now pending to bar Dorian from
AMTRAK.  As travel becomes more difficult for him, Dorian is thinking
of early retirement in Alaska or some other remote location.  Reports
indicate that the Alaska National Guard is massing at the border.
                                                                 {RAH}
