Underground Informer
Volume 5 Issue 18
November 5, 1994
Page 2


 =================  -------
 Delta's Magic Bar  Delta 1
 =================  -------

                                   A.L.F. 2
                                    Part 8

                                                 Copyright (c) 1994 Delta 1...

     I'm told the greatest mystery of life is the meaning of life.  Perhaps 
for some this is true.  Certainly most of us turn to our god for the answer at 
some point in our lives.  I had always thought the meaning of life would be 
something different for everyone.  While there is little reason for me to cast 
aside this theory, I must say that being chased by the government, having a 
talking green jackrabbit as companion, and being rescued by silver guys from 
the planet Pongo sure puts a different spin on things.  Perhaps that's why I 
wasn't all that concerned when the silver guy announced on his way out the 
door to get us lunch that he was about to blow up the Earth.

     "So do you think he means it?" inquired the rabbit.

     I thought about it a bit.  "Yeah, he seems a nice guy.  I'm sure he'll 
bring us lunch," I said as something pricked at the edge of my memory.

     "No, I mean about blowing up the Earth.  Do you think he was joking?" the 
rabbit ventured.

     "I expect lunch will be something we can eat.  I don't see their 
poisoning us after rescuing us," I observed.

     I almost had it, but it danced away from me again, a darting shadow there  
at the edge of my mind, teasing me.  "If they do blow up the planet, you're 
never going to get laid again," taunted the rabbit.

     The harder I tried to grasp the thought the quicker it slipped away.  It 
was just so damn frustrating.  What was it the rabbit had said, something 
about getting laid?  "Look, you're really not my type, though I do appreciate 
the offer," I stuttered.  I'd never had a rabbit come on to me before.  I 
wasn't quite sure what to say, let alone how to tell what sex it was.

     "And they call rabbits dumb bunnies," muttered the rabbit as the silver 
guy pushed a cart of food into the room. 

     Lunch wasn't alien at all.  In fact, it came from Burger King.  A mental 
picture of a flying saucer pulling up to the drive-through window flitted 
through my mind while I set aside a large bag of French fries, unwrapped a 
double cheeseburger, then removed the pickles and set them aside.  "We find 
your fast food to have an interesting flavor, but we are not sure it's at all 
good for you.  Still, you seem to like it," commented the silver guy as he 
passed me a strawberry milkshake.  I thought it over.  He was probably right, 
but then everything seemed bad for you these days.  Hadn't someone just 
released some kind of report on buttered popcorn?  

     I considered the salad the silver man set before the green rabbit.  Sure, 
it looked healthy, but within its bright green leaves were a number of 
chemicals that sped its growth rate, helped keep the bugs from eating it, and 
retarded the growth of molds.  There might even be something on it to retard 
spoilage.  Did anyone really know the compound effects of these things on the 
body?  Was it all just a guessing game played with cancer rates?  I watched as 
the rabbit nibbled the green leaves, prodding a tomato out of the way as it 
burrowed in seeking a tasty morsel.  I took a bite of my burger.  What the 
hell, nobody lives forever.

     I was inattentively munching on a French fry when the thought that had 
been eluding me surfaced and hit me over the head with a sledgehammer.  Bits 
of French fry scattered across the room as I shouted, "They shot me!"

     There were a lot of things I wasn't clear on that had taken place in the  
missing week of my life.  I still wasn't clear on most of them, but the image 
of a fisherman in an underground complex who had ordered me shot to make a 
rabbit talk suddenly leapt into my mind.  "Why didn't you talk?" I shouted 
accusingly at the rabbit.

     "I thought he was bluffing and I knew he was crazy.  Can't say I wanted 
to end up spread across a laboratory table.  Besides, it wouldn't have saved 
you from being shot," commented the rabbit.  I thought it over as I sipped my 
milkshake.  The rabbit did have a point.

(Continued on next page)

                            ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

